Sunday, February 25, 2007

Current Events

My first tax season in an accounting office. Good times.

Our lameass neighbors moved out, making my week. List of things I hated about them:
1. Douchebag smoked constantly on their porch (which is adjoined to ours).
2. While smoking, douchebag constantly talked. Loudly.
3. They had a baby, which always was crying. Yes, I realize that this is what babies do- and it's one of the many reasons I don't want/have/like babies.
4. Douchebag was a budding artist. In fact, I love art, and would generally encourage anyone to take up artistic endeavors. However, Douchbag's art not only contributed to numbers 1 and 2 above (and possibly 3 as well), not to mention it was terrible, and a little creepy to look at. A particular self-and-baby portrait, replete with a Gap-logoed baseball cap comes to mind.

Sunday, February 11, 2007

Reunification

So The Police are reuniting at the Grammys tonite.
Everyone knows Sting became a total pussy at the end of his tenure with the band...
so will he remain a pussy, or be redeemed?
Stay tuned.

Friday, February 2, 2007

Alternate Explanations For My Black Eye and Chin Cuts

-I was hit in the face by a guitar.
-I got in a fight with Isaiah Washington defending TR Knight's honor.
-The Cloud Mafia had a particularly intense rumble up in Paso.
-I was hit in the face twice by penises.

More to come as I think of inappropriate lies.