Bands I Wish I Liked

-Crass: So punk, but so bad. I love everything about them except their music.
-Fucked Up: Mostly because the singer's bald and fat.
-Pavement: No cred for me, I guess.
-Melvins: I just can't back Buzz's voice.
-Jawbreaker: You don't remember them because you're not OG emo like me and my peer group.
-Pink Floyd: I like the whole idea of Syd Barrett and playing at a volcano, but then my good taste in music kicks in.

Thats all for now.

Random Shit

The new pad is infested... with helicopters.
Seriously. All the time (like, once a night, at least). The bastards are so loud one can't hear the television if the windows are open. What business does the ghetto bird have in Corona Del Mar? I want to know.

Speaking of infestations- bugs seem to be especially attracted to me lately, and it's gross. Spiders, beetles, the horde of wasps that has kicked me out of my preferred lunch area... Ridiculous. Mosquitoes have always been overly attracted to me, which is unfortunate due to my high level of reaction to them. The little fuckers nearly caused a nervous breakdown in France a few years ago, and are responsible for my hatered of the town of Nice (and, interestingly enough, my love of socialized French pharmacies).

Things I Like to Make Fun Of:

Because I'm an asshole, and am really quite funny.

-Overly concerned parents ("My Babies!")
-PT Cruisers
-Religion
-People talking on their Bluetooths
-Radiohead
-MySpace profiles
-Your favorite bands
-Jock culture: bros, brew-has, hoverload, brew-hos, lifted trucks, dirtbikes, wakeboarding, slutty girls with blonde/stripey hair, Huntington Beach, Riverside, Pennywise (ha, "Bro-Hymn," this shit writes itself), Social Distortion
-Heartwarming stories
-Tattoos
-Sex In The City
-BMW's
-Hats
-Bad taste in guitars
-Scene kids
-The Valuation of Adulthood

I think I'll stop there. This could've gone on forever.

Dear Matt Taibbi

Your articles show a wit, insight, intelligence, and analytical prowess that are incredibly uncharacteristic within the brutal journalistic abortion that is Rolling Stone Magazine.
You deserve better.
Thanks,

Brian

[See what I mean?]

Locale

Here's some lists I made based on where I grew up and where I live now.

5 Best things about growing up in Paso:
1. The splendid isolation of Hall Manor
2. Living far out of town forced me to nerd out (books, computers, guitars), and initiated a renaissance when I got the drivers licsense.
3. Oldest friends
4. Highschool shenanigans and/or hijinks.
5. Punk rock and skateboarding

Best things about living in Orange County:
1. Best beaches in America
2. Weather
3. Entertainment (including proximity to LA/SD)
4. Cleanliness
5. Employment

Best things about Corona Del Mar specifically:
1. Awesome shit in walking distance
2. Hearing the waves, sea lions and foghorns in the morning
3. The smoothest paved streets I've yet to experience=skateboard pleasure
4. Trees, grass
5. Thai Del Mar

Worst things about Paso:
1. People: white trash, lake rats, motocross bros, general brew-ha action, druggie ass meth burnouts, people from highschool I don't want to see at the movie theater over the holidays
2. Christian Conservative assholes
3. Heat. And Cold.
4.  The wine "industry"
5. Isolation

Worst things about Orange County
1. Christian Conservative assholes
2. People: white trash, lake rats, motocross bros, general brew-ha action, scene kids
3. Wealth and sense of entitlement
4. Weather
5. Music scene

Best restaurants in SLO County
1. Cafe Roma
2. Thai Classic
3. The new Italian place across from Boo Boo's
4. Tio Albertos
5. Big Sky Cafe

Best restaurants in my immediate area:
1. Thai Del Mar
2. Giorgio La Trattoria
3. El Matador (tied with) Great Mex
4. Native Foods
5. Bandera has fabulous pork loin

Worst towns in Orange County:
1. Laguna Hills/Aliso Viejo/Mission Viejo/Lake Forest faceless, culture-free staletropolis
2. Huntington Beach broverload/hoverload
3. Garden Grove, shit covered in shit, baked on asphalt
4. Fountain Valley, like above, but literally smelling of shit.
5. Fullerton should probably be reclassified as part of Riverside, but must remain free of too much scorn because Fender (and G&L) originated there.