As The Mighty Marvin Gaye Once Said, "What's Goin' On?"

Answer: nothing.
Sorry Marvin.

-Too many records to buy, too little $$$. New Sonic Youth tomorrow will burn a hole in my wallet, however.

-Lakers, Lakers, Lakers. I've kept my love of basketball (actually, just Lakers Basketball really) hidden from nearly everyone for a really long time.
I suppose there are several reasons for this:
A. Definitely not punk.
B. Too much Nike. All that swoosh represents is the enslavement of thousands of Chinese babies.
C. Team sports go against my ruggedly individualistic nature. The American dream, right?
Anyways, in my old age (57 this November), I've been getting to the bottom of the following:
A. Not being so much of a dick.
B. Getting back to my roots.
C. "It's like Hamlet said- 'To Thine Own Self Be True.'"
"Hamlet didn't say that
"I think I remember Hamlet accurately."
"Well, I remember Mel Gibson accurately, and he didn't say that. That Polonius guy did."
So that's a lot of existentialism backing up my Los Angeles Lakers fandom. I've got no exit strategy for that point.

-Ladies & Gentlemen: The Fabulous Stains! Finally available. So, the movie may not technically be very well filmed, but the message is undeniable. They should show this to young girls everywhere. It does a very good job of telling the story of strong girls without trivializing them. Netflix it- seriously. I first learned about it through the transcendently-before-it's time Grand Royal Magazine. Which brings me to:

-Grand Royal Magazine. If there was ever any one group of people that were/are consistently ahead of every curve, it's the associates of Grand Royal. Initially, GR was the Beastie Boys vanity record label- however, it evolved into the most unbelievably trend-predating tastemaking organization in the history of pop culture. Not only did GR bring us 4 beyond-great Beastie Boys full lengths (and countless single/eps: see Aglio E Olio, Country Mike's Greatest Hits, Root Down), but they also introduced most of the world to Spike Jonze (Sabotage. Where The Wild Things Are. Girlfilms. Genius!), At The Drive-In, artist sanctioned mp3s (really. Ask this guy), and the Mullet (I'm not kidding). Grand Royal Magazine ("Long Awaited, Much Anticipated, Grossly Outdated") was their compendium of coolness. It only lasted 6 issues, but contained way too much excellence to post here. I have all the issues except for the first and fourth ones, which are nearly impossible to find- so let me know if you come across one. I re-read them all from time to time, when I feel like I need tips on Adidas Vs. Puma, building a demolition derby car, the best ways to harass Ted Nugent, Moog Synthesizers or the truly original expose on the mullet epidemic. Ultimately, the Beastie Boys' unwavering ability to see the future got them out of the record label business before the shitstorm, and now Grand Royal Magazine is a memento of a cooler time- just the sort of thing that the magazine would've written about.

-Dinosaur Jr, Freak Scene. Had to "get" the remastered version of Bug (see first item, above). It sounds 1000 times better than the original version, and just fucking shreds. I am now 100% a Dinosaur Jr. fan, whereas I was only like 50-75% before Saturday. Also, perhaps I could work this verse into my wedding vows?
Sometimes I dont thrill you
Sometimes I think Ill kill you
Just dont let me fuck up will you
cause when I need a friend its still you
Cute!

Rrrrrrecords

Recent Listenings:

Mastodon: Crack The Skye- Still great. Actually, rather unfortunately, I lost my cd of this (it may have been stolen at the carwash- that was the last place I saw it, but I thoroughly doubt those dudes are Mastodon fans), so I hadn't had much chance to listen to it until I burned myself a new copy. In the metal world, no one does layering like Mastodon, and it really must be turned up pretty loud to get all the little interesting parts. That, and I'm deaf.

Beastie Boys: Check Your Head Remastered B-Sides- Perhaps more than any other record (save the Descendents' Somery and the Minor Threat record), Check Your Head defined my teenage/highschool years. It was even in my cd player when I picked Dawn up for our first date (cute). I had tapes of tapes of bootlegs with these B-sides on them, so it brings back a lot of memories of causing/getting into trouble. And, more philosophically, it really inspired me to play music and broaden my horizons. These came as a free lossless download when I ordered the CYH Remastered vinyl, so I can finally replace my 96k mp3's that were among the first digital audio files I ever encountered.

Wire: Chairs Missing- Bigger fan of Pink Flag, but I Am The Fly is a brilliant song, as the limeys might say. I've already listened to the record twice today. Interestingly enough, the last time I listened to it, according to iTunes was exactly 364 days ago. Also of note- if you want to remaster your records and have them sound great- get the Wire dudes to do it. I don't know how, but they have the best sounding remastered catalog ever, especially considering they recorded it originally in the late 70's with ultra-low budget punk gear. Even Jimmy Page can't remaster that well.

Godspeed You! Black Emperor: Lift Your Skinny Fists Like Antennas To Heaven- This is some serious shit. I kid you not, I had to turn off the lights and light a candle to listen to this. And it worked. Aaaaatttttmmmmmooooosssssppppphhhhheeeeerrrrreeeee.
The record kind of sneaks into your brain like a parasite and feeds on your nerves, and you're none the wiser. The 3rd "movement," entitled Sleep, WILL fuck your shit up.

Why I Try Not To Write About Music (UPDATED)

[When I originally wrote this, the Buddyhead website was down (way down), but, merely a day or two after I clicked "Post," theyre back (way back). Even with a new gossip post! It's like 2002 all over again! So, in short, THEY WIN.]


Because there are a few people that do it far better (and far less annoyingly).
If you're interested, check these out (in no particular order):
Buddyhead- the original and best. They've mellowed out (at least in terms of spending time on the internet), but have always been unstoppable. Much to the chagrin of their enemies (countless), they actually know what they are talking about and have great tast in music (I'm willing to forgive the Oasis-worship, dudes). For god's sake, they're language artists, brah.
Stereogum- All around top quality (and it's sister site, Videogum, is one of the best sites of any category, ever)
Idolator- Interesting articles, less news-reporty than Stereogum or BV.
An Aquarium Drunkard- Low post volume, but of the absolute highest quality, musically, aesthetically, and writing-wise. Stunningly good.

The Business of The Business

It's taken me a while to chill out after that last post, but I think I've reached my equilibrium once more. Here's some shit that sucks way less than that horrible movie:

-Our wedding has a blog. How technological! I'm having a hard time not being pretentious and cynical on that one (see: "The wedding event of the Century-" sorry, I was a Marketing & Hyperbole major).
Check it out: http://dawnandbrianswedding.blogspot.com/
-Choosing menu items for said wedding- even though Dawn didn't like my original Asian-fusion theme. Early California Homestyle, here we come! (The Chili theme was passed over as well- bummer.)
-Listening to the Paul's Boutique reissue non-stop. The mix is way better, plus it sounds great on wax.
-Also listening to Spiritualized's Ladies & Gentlemen We Are Floating In Space almost as non-stop. It really is a masterpiece too. He's doing a Don't Look Back performance of the record in the UK and I would give my cousin Michael's kidney to go. Sorry Michael, but that's the price for tax advice.
-...And You Will Know Us By The Trail of Dads: The Century of Self- another really good plateful of jams.
-The time changing back. Unfortunately, this just makes laziness harder. Possible, but harder nonetheless (that's what she said).
-iPhone OS 3.0: Yeah, copy & paste, finally.

Currently: Music

Recent Listening List:
Morrissey: Years of Refusal- Well, truthfully, it's probably waiting on my doorstep right now, but I know it's good and that I'll be listening to it constantly for the next year- like with any Morrissey record.
John Frusciante: The Empyrean- Jesus, this is good. I could listen to the first 2 songs forever. I even listened to the first track @45 rpm and it was great (it's an instrumental, so no high pitched vocals to contend with). Said first track makes me think of if Peter Green/Fleetwood Mac recorded "Albatross" after binging on Joy Division, Fugazi and Jimi Hendrix- so it's pretty much a fantasy track for me. On the whole it's easily his best non-that-other-horrible-band-he's-in-with-Flea.
Mogwai: EP Compilation Mix CD- This one never worked correectly in my old car cd player for some reason. Sounds great now though.
Animal Collective: Merriweather Post Pavilion- Pretty good record, definitely not the best I've ever heard, as the Pitchfork rubes would have you believe. It has a nice, thick, bassy production that I dig. 
The Lonely Island: Incredibad- Yeah, Lazy Sunday and Dick In A Box are old and overexposed, but I fully endorse this album. I'm On A Boat is my favorite (especially the autotuned/vocoded "muthafuckaaaaa" parts).

Why The Fuck Has This Not Been ReMastered? Episode One

Sunny Day Real Estate: Diary
For fuck's sake- this is one of the greatest records of the 90's, and it sounds terrible. Luckily for all of us, the excellent songcraft shines through the horrible, muddy mix. Jeremy Enigk needs to get over himself, do the respectable thing by making the record sound like it should, and even, as a side benefit, make some fucking cash (everyone knows Nate Mendel had to pay for the first Fire Theft record).
Ratings in it's present form: Songs: 9.5, Mix: 2.0.
Jeremy/Sub Pop- DO THE RIGHT THING.

Some Times It Just Takes a While To Get Things Done

Like, say, 6 or 7 years.
Case in point: my turntable. Like any self-respecting young "punker," I've had a record player and the requisite Minor Threat 7"s for years. However, I never had it set up correctly- until last night. See, I never had a stereo with the proper phono input/preamp, so playing records involved plugging the beast into my crappy bookshelf stereo and turning the volume waaaaay up, and listening to records without the proper EQ curve. I could've bought a phono preamp, but who has $50, right?
Anyway, I recently aquired the proper receiver/preamp, bought a classy new needle/cartridge, bought some new speakers (hooray gift certificates!), new speaker wire, etc. etc. etc. After a liberal application of electrical contact cleaner (the balance & volume knobs were corroded, causing distortion and general not-workiness) last night, I'm in business- finally. And it really does sound great. Apparently the reciever I got from my parent's house is very well thought of in stereo cicles (it's a Luxman R-117, if you care. But I know you don't). Fantastic. I don't plan on replacing my (hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of) cds, but when new stuff, or stuff that I don't physically own is available on vinyl, that's what I'm buying.
One thing I've got to get used to: having to stand up and walk over to the record to see the track names.
One thing I don't need to get used to: vinyl really does sound better. I hate to admit it, but it's true.

Records I've been listening to on the beast:
-Hot Snakes: Suicide Invoice (with a rad extended version of Paid In Cigarettes that I'd never heard until now!)
-Mogwai: Bat Cat EP (it's a 12" 45! Those crazy Scots!)
-At The Drive-In: One Armed Scissor single (yes, there were some cool things about my old job.)
-T.Rex: Electric Warrior (I always regretted buying the album from iTunes, and now I've made it right.)
-Big Black: Songs About Fucking (of course I have to have a Steve Albini record on vinyl. It's virtually required.)